Hannah Gould wrote How to Die in the 21st Century for ‘everyone who will live, die and grieve’. (That’s all of us.) We are living longer however ‘we are not doing death particularly well.’ The book is approachable and easy to read, despite a seemingly heavy topic. The ideas are organised into six easy lessons starting with contemplating death, the realities of dying, and the inevitable disposal phase. I found the final few lessons the most intriguing, which explore the different ways that people respond in the aftermath of death, sometimes with celebration, grieving and/or memorialising.
This book is gritty, confronting and practical yet profound, compassionate and positive. Gould challenges existing ‘deathcare systems’ informed by established medical, psychological, religious and cultural processes, protocols and ideologies. He explores several long-held assumptions, thoughts and beliefs about death, some of which are not particularly well matched or suitable for all humans in the 21st century.
I loved the full-page quotes featured throughout, accompanied by ‘flower with dropped petal’ motif, to reinforce the key ideas. Each chapter concludes with useful and practical activities including ‘How to deliver a eulogy’, ‘How to help a grieving friend’ and ‘How to scatter ashes.’
As an accepting Homer Simpson finally offers in his interaction with Dr Hibbert: ‘Well, we’ve all got to go sometime.’
Reviewed by Mark Parry
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
I am a cultural anthropologist interested in death, Buddhism, and material culture in Australia and North-East Asia. My research spans new traditions and technologies of Buddhist death rites, the lifecycle of religious materials, and modern lifestyle movements. In sum, I study the stuff of death and death of stuff.
I am currently Senior Lecturer in Buddhist Studies in the School of Historical and Philosophical Studies, at the University of Melbourne.
Alongside academic research and publishing, I create public programs to advocate for more equitable systems of deathcare for all.
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