MARGARITA NAZARENKO is a writer, podcaster and content creator, with over two million views. Her book Unbothered compiles the most commonly asked question that her followers have been asking her for years: How to be truly ‘unbothered.’ How to understand yourself and your needs in a world that begs for instant connection.

Read on for an extract.

ABOUT THE BOOK

Since she made her first TikTok in 2021, social media sensation Margarita Nazarenko has built a massive following, with 1.5 million TikTok followers, 600,000 Instagram followers and millions of YouTube views. She’s also learned a lot about what her followers are experiencing and what is bothering them. She’s discovered that what they really want is to be unbothered – they want to learn how to detach from situations and relationships that are stopping them making the most of themselves and their lives.

Unbothered is a modern manifesto for the woman who’s done over-functioning in love. It speaks to the heart of a generation of women who are emotionally exhausted from chasing the unavailable, proving their worth, and holding relationships together alone.

This book offers a clear, compassionate roadmap to let go – not to lose, but to lead. Grounded in psychology, nervous system regulation, and feminine identity, Unbothered reframes emotional detachment as strength, not coldness. It is not another book about boundaries or breakups – it’s about identity. It’s about choosing peace over potential.

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EXTRACT

The Ache of Almost

There’s a particular ache that comes from being almost loved the way you need.

Almost chosen. Almost respected. Almost secure.

It’s not a scream. It’s a hum. Quiet, constant, like a refrigerator buzz. You stop hearing it until the night goes still … and then there it is again.

You tell yourself you’re fine. You’re strong, you can carry it, and you can … but not without cost. You start curating your own smallness, shaving the edges off your needs. Laughing at jokes that land like paper cuts, rearranging your day for a maybe. You turn your body into a waiting room: phone face-down, heart face-up, eyes on the door.

You begin performing for crumbs and calling it a meal. A story view becomes a sign, a ‘hey, sorry, been slammed’ feels like oxygen. You convince yourself that this is better than nothing … until you realise it’s costing you everything: your sleep, your self-respect, your intuition; the quiet animal inside that always knows. Always knew.

The ache of almost doesn’t take you out; it wears you down, dissolving you like sugar in hot tea.

If I’m a bit cooler, they’ll stay. If I explain better, they’ll understand.

If I don’t ask for much, I’ll be safe.

You test both myths we’ve been sold. First, the Cool Girl who needs nothing, swallowing her feelings with her coffee and calling it peace. Then, the Emotionally Perfect Girl who shares everything on cue and calls it connection. Different costumes; same ache.

Because here’s the truth: ‘almost’ is a contract in which your worth is always on probation. You keep it only if you don’t need too much, if you carry both sides of the bridge, if you perform. So you start editing yourself. Lighter, easier, smaller … and somehow heavier at the same time. Your mind becomes a control room of tiny levers:

Don’t say that. Say it this way. Wait an hour. Wait two. Don’t look keen. Don’t look cold. Be available.

Be chill. Be everything at once.

And still, you starve.

I know that hunger. The kind no podcast, pep talk or Notes app rule can touch. Don’t text first. Don’t double text. Be mysterious. Be transparent. You’ve tried both ends of the rope and burned your hands each time.

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What if I told you that the problem was never your sensitivity, but your investment? You’ve been pouring sacred energy into leaky containers – people and patterns that cannot, or will not, hold it. You’ve been trained to treat your heart like a tip jar: optional, occasional, appreciated when convenient.

No more.

This book is an invitation to return to the woman beneath the strategies, the one who knows the difference between loving deeply and working overtime to be lovable. The one who can say ‘I want closeness’ without handing someone else the remote to her nervous system.

If you’ve lived in the ache of almost, you already have the raw material for this transformation. The attentiveness that once scanned every tone and timestamp? We’ll turn it inward, to create self-knowledge, self-soothing and self-trust. The devotion you lavished on inconsistency? We’ll re-home it in friendships, work and communities that reciprocate. The discipline you harnessed to perform ‘cool’? We’ll use it to protect your peace.

You don’t need to become a different person. You need to become the person you are when you stop bargaining. The woman who doesn’t audition, doesn’t beg safety from chaos. The woman who can let go without making it a war and receive without making it a debt.

The Unbothered Woman is not unfeeling; she just chooses what gets to move her. She knows what is hers to carry and what is absolutely not. Being unbothered is staying soft in the places that make you luminous, and firm in the places that keep you whole.

There will be moments as you read when your old wiring tries to negotiate: maybe I can keep the crumbs and get the feast. That’s just the hum talking.

For now, take a breath, hand on chest, hand on belly. Feel the rise and fall … the proof of life you don’t have to earn.

You were never meant to survive on almost, you deserve a life that doesn’t ask you to disappear to keep it. You were built for steady love.

The hum won’t like what comes next. You will.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Margarita Nazarenko is a globally recognised voice in feminine psychology, confidence and identity. With a multi-platform reach of over 2 million (TikTok, Instagram, YouTube), and a podcast (Being Her) that ranks in the top 25 global education charts, she has cultivated a loyal, emotionally engaged female audience.

Her debut, The New Rules, positioned her as one of Australia’s leading voices in self-development. Margarita combines grounded wisdom, cultural insight and personal storytelling to offer a new kind of empowerment – one rooted in emotional intelligence, not performance.

She lives in Sydney, Australia with her husband and two children.

Visit Margarita Nazarenko’s website here.

Follow Margarita Nazarenko on Instagram here.

Read more about Unbothered on the publisher’s website here.