Three monitor lizards are waiting for the school bus. Daniel and Alicia are clouded monitors, but Zeke is a peach-throated monitor and much bigger. In fact, he’s the second biggest kid at the school. He also has France living on his knee. Today Daniel’s wearing a pink hat.

Our threesome are all sash-wearing hall monitors, watching out for students arriving late. It doesn’t help their level of popularity.

As Zeke ponders the pink hat, he thinks, ‘There’s going to be trouble.’

As they travel on the bus, they notice a tall, narrow tower being built on top of the tallest hill where their nemesis, Pelicarnassus, and his mum live. Are they are building a Death Ray of Death?

At school they meet Miel, a hawk, who can’t help but SHOUT WHEN HE SPEAKS. Miel doesn’t like hats but is sure Daniel’s is wonderful. ‘See,’ Alicia says to Zeke, ‘it’s going to be fine.

‘Reader, it was not fine.’

When Peggy, a flounder, is transferred to the school, arriving in a tank on wheels, Miels is anxiety ridden as he tries to tamper his desire to eat fish. As the hat draws attention, trouble arises with friendships and suddenly the Death Ray of Death roars to life and melts Zeke’s house.

This book is a giggle, cleverly weaving real issues with total and utter silliness. There’s a suspicious guidance counsellor and France shouting words of encouragement from Zeke’s knee. The line drawings throughout add to the story and make this an even more enjoyable read.

ΗΗΗΗΗ Walker Books $16.99

Reviewed by Jane Stephens

Age Guide 8+

Rea a book review of the first book in the series

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I’m Patrick Ness. I claim three states in America as my home (as Americans are wont to do): I was born in Virginia, my first memories are Hawaiian, and I went to junior high and high school in Washington. Then I lived in California for college (at USC) and moved to the United Kingdom in 1999, where I’ve lived (mostly in London) ever since.

I’ve won the Carnegie Medal twice, the Costa Children’s Book Award, the Guardian Children’s Fiction Prize, the Red House Book Award, the Jugendliteratur Preis, the UKLA Award, the Booktrust Teenage Prize and the fabulous, fabulous, fabulous Jim Kay also won the Greenaway for his illustrations in A Monster Calls (so buy that version, would you?).

I write screenplays as well, including for the movie version of A Monster Calls starring Liam Neeson, Sigourney Weaver and Felicity Jones.

I love the Decemberists, Peter Carey and A&W Cream Soda. I dislike onions. Intensely.

Visit Patrick Ness’ website